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Below are the 20 most recent journal entries recorded in Sharp Objects' LiveJournal:

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Sunday, August 23rd, 2009
3:37 am
[cassiecain32120]

name: Cassie
age: 19
living situation: in five days i'm off to college for sophmore year (:
how long have you cut? 1 year
how long since you last cut? a couple minutes ago
does anyone know you cut? one person
do you know anyone else who cuts? I know someone who used to but doesn't anymore, my cousin
tell me something awesome about you: A couple years down the line I'm gonna be a best selling novelist. (not under cassie, cassie is just a code name b/c i cant let ppl i know find out i cut) (:   & I love martial arts.
tell me something sucky about you: I'm numb inside.  I lost my family.  They are alive, but that's worse because they are alive and there but gone. 
who is your favorite band/musician? Kerli Koiv, Meg & Dia, Avril Lavinge
what is your best skill? write & fight (;
if you were reincarnated, what would you like to be?: i believe in heaven (:

Sunday, July 26th, 2009
5:07 am
[emoprincess456]

Name: Cassondra
Age: 14
Living Situation: with parents.
How long have you cut? since 4th grade
How long since you last cut? 3 mins ago
Does anyone know you cut? idk?!
Do you know anyone else who cuts? yes
Tell me something awesome about you: my bf, my friends......
Tell me something sucky about you: my life......
Who is your favorite band/musician? flyleaf
What is your best skill? cutting
If you were reincarnated, what would you like to be?: idk
Saturday, July 4th, 2009
1:36 am
[innocentspawn]
I'm New
Name: Amanda
Age: 19
Living Situation: Homeless [[So Here and There]]
How long have you cut? Since I was 12
How long since you last cut? two days ago.
Does anyone know you cut? I Keep it to myself, Unless someone confides in me that they cut, Then I know It's safe.
Do you know anyone else who cuts? yes.
Tell me something awesome about you: I am good at cheering people up. Just not myself lol.
Tell me something sucky about you: I can be very hard to handle.
Who is your favorite band/musician? Otep
What is your best skill? Writing I hope...
If you were reincarnated, what would you like to be?: Something Beautiful.
 
Wednesday, July 1st, 2009
9:29 am
[lauralove95]
Failure !xx
Hi I'm Laura.

Age: 13
Living Situation:  with mum and dad
How long have you cut? about one year
How long since you last cut? 3 days ago
Does anyone know you cut? yes my closest freinds and one of my freinds dads hoo is also a social worker i talk to him about it and he tries to help me but i dont get to talk to him much and my mum and dad know
Do you know anyone else who cuts? yes
Tell me something awesome about you:  im an identicle twin and my hair is awsme
Tell me something sucky about you:   i am constantly getting blamed for things that aren't my fault
Who is your favorite band/musician? linkin park and madina lake and simple plan
What is your best skill? inline skating
If you were reincarnated, what would you like to be? a golden eagle

Current Mood: distressed
Friday, June 26th, 2009
4:46 pm
[cutterslife]
Name: Unknown
Age: 15
Living Situation: with parents.
How long have you cut? since 4th grade
How long since you last cut? this morning
Does anyone know you cut? yes not many tho
Do you know anyone else who cuts? yes but nt too well
Tell me something awesome about you: i have 7 siblings
Tell me something sucky about you:  i have 8 ppl in a 3 bedroom house. mom and step dad are both abusive. (verbly/physical) 
Who is your favorite band/musician? um well i like christian music. but i dnt have a fav band
What is your best skill? lying
If you were reincarnated, what would you like to be?: idk

 



Current Mood: blank
Sunday, December 7th, 2008
12:33 am
[x_hatedbylove_x]


Name: Zie
Age: 15
Living Situation: with parents.
How long have you cut? since i was 11
How long since you last cut? yesterday
Does anyone know you cut? it is assumed by most but only 2 kno that i do for sure
Do you know anyone else who cuts? yeah me and my other half (leigh) but she doesn't n-e more
Tell me something awesome about you: i play guitar in a band if you call that awesome...
Tell me something sucky about you: i'm a pothead who doesn't ever do anything but write lyrics and watch "dude...where's my car?"
And "sweeney todd: the demon barber of fleet street"
Who is your favorite band/musician? sum 41 slipknot marilyn manson job for a cowboy and i guess hollywood undead
What is your best skill? being a total burnout
If you were reincarnated, what would you like to be?: a stoner late 60's early 70's living in a painted trippy van tricked out to the extreame.
 

 



Current Mood: numb
Sunday, June 5th, 2005
12:34 pm
[lizzi_has_died]
stopping
i'm trying to stop cutting and i am finding it quite strange. it's been nearly 4 weeks but i'm scared that i'm gonna slip again and lose my friends that already don't approve.

Current Mood: scared
Wednesday, June 1st, 2005
8:31 pm
[shazennium]
Dear fellow cutters,
I am making a decision to leave the community due to the fact that i havent layed a sharp object to my arm or any part of my body in ages, and i feel there is no need to be apart of something of which i don't use much. Thank you for your kindness and good luck to all those who wish to stop, and even those who don't, your all making wonderful decisions. If you ever need to talk to someone or just need to babble to someone just buzz me and i'll do my best.

Feel free to add me.

Love you all!
Thursday, February 10th, 2005
5:26 pm
[thesisresearch]
Hi,

My name is Meg and I'm doing a study on female former self-injurers for my undergraduate thesis. I was a self-injurer myself for two years, and i've been in recovery for five.

If you are a female former self-injurer, i'd really appreciate it if you'd take a few minutes and fill out my survey.

There is more information about the project and the survey here.

If you know anyone else who might be interested in participating please let them know! Thanks!

[x-posted a bunch of places]
Friday, February 4th, 2005
8:47 am
[shazennium]

name: Shantel (i prefer Shaz)
age: 17
living situation:
MY mother, and two ADHD and Autistic brothers,
how long have you cut? 3 years
how long since you last cut? A few hours
does anyone know you cut? Some friends i think, although i don't really tell anyone.

do you know anyone else who cuts? YEs i do

tell me something awesome about you: I'm eccentric sometimes and i have the worst moodswings
tell me something sucky about you: I'm a natural brunette despite how blonde i act that and one of my fav colors are pink
who is your favorite band/musician? Placebo, Marilyn Manson, & Linkin Park
what is your best skill? to piss people off
if you were reincarnated, what would you like to be?: anything but me



Current Mood: sleepy
Sunday, November 21st, 2004
7:04 pm
[loves_kittens]
I'm new here
well, to this community anyway. I've been cutting since I was 13 (I'm know 19) and I would like to stop, but I don't know how. It's been about a month since I cut, and I have to give credit to some friends of mine who keep me on the phone at all hours of the night and make me promise not to. But right now, it is really tempting and I'm not sure I can get past this.
Sunday, July 11th, 2004
4:49 am
[luv_shain]
Friday, June 11th, 2004
11:40 pm
[bleedingstar420]

name: Megan age: 15

living situation: mom, dad, 16 year old sister, and her 6 month old baby

how long have you cut? 3 1/2 years

how long since you last cut? two days

does anyone know you cut? like two or three of my closest friends..

do you know anyone else who cuts? like two people..alot of people do it...they just don't admit it...

tell me something awesome about you: umm...i don't think there really is anything 'awsome' about me...

tell me something sucky about you: everything pretty much..i think too much!!!

who is your favorite band/musician? Slipkknot...and Marilyn Manson

what is your best skill? fucking up my life if you were reincarnated,

what would you like to be?: dead!



Current Mood: blah
Sunday, March 14th, 2004
9:42 pm
[fredskittie]
'lo.
Name: Cody
Age: 17
Living Situation: with parents.
How long have you cut? since i was 12.
How long since you last cut? the beginning of this week sometime.
Does anyone know you cut? yes. i was 'outed' to all my friends last year by a stupid crush.
Do you know anyone else who cuts? not regularly, maybe once or twice in their lives.
Tell me something awesome about you: i write
Tell me something sucky about you: i'm a pothead who completely lacks motivation.
Who is your favorite band/musician? alkaline trio at the moment.
What is your best skill? writing
If you were reincarnated, what would you like to be?: a hippie living in the 60s, but going back in time doesn't count, does it? well then i'd like to be an ... um... mermaid.

Current Mood: tired
Monday, March 8th, 2004
6:04 pm
[deaths_twilight]
name: Kate
age: 17
living situation: with my Dad and step-mother
how long have you cut? 6 years
how long since you last cut? A week or 2 ago
does anyone know you cut? Some friends, my parents "forgot" it was happening about 5 years ago
do you know anyone else who cuts? Most of my friends...wait, all of them
tell me something awesome about you: I'm a writer
tell me something sucky about you: My mind won't let me have anything good, oh yea and i'm insame
who is your favorite band/musician? AFI
what is your best skill? fucking up my life
if you were reincarnated, what would you like to be?: A faerie

Current Mood: crappy
Saturday, January 10th, 2004
12:49 am
[curtainfalls]
..i'm new...
Age: 20
Living Situation: College dorm, moving out into an apartment off campus in May
How long have you cut? since I was 11, severely since 7th grade
How long since you last cut? December 12th
Does anyone know you cut? yes
Do you know anyone else who cuts? yes
Tell me something awesome about you: I have green eyes
Tell me something sucky about you: This isnt my primary journal because I'm paranoid about my friends. They all think I've "recovered completely"
Who is your favorite band/musician? Saves the Day, the Beatles.. too many CDs
What is your best skill? I'm a kickass teacher, I work at a primary school...
If you were reincarnated, what would you like to be?: A caged bird
Friday, January 9th, 2004
3:55 pm
[bloodxdollie]
Behind the cut is the story of my life, if you care to read it.
And my file at the mental hospital goes something like thisCollapse )
Friday, December 19th, 2003
11:31 am
[missfreyja]
name: Leslie
age: 29
living situation: Living with boyfriend
how long since you last cut? can't remember.. but last burned myself at 23
does anyone know you cut? not many
do you know anyone else who cuts? yes
tell me something awesome about you: I write poetry, waterpaint, do crafty things, and I know a lot about cars
tell me something sucky about you: I never seem to have enough money, and it constantly causes anxiety and depression
who is your favorite band/musician? Enslaved, Emperor, Immortal, Lacuna Coil
what is your best skill? Writing or painting, I suppose
if you were reincarnated, what would you like to be?: I would really not come back again as anything, I would rather just go back to the cosmos.



Wow. I was flipping through communities that had depression as a keyword, and this one came up. As I was reading through the symptoms of borderline, I realized, wow, all of that is me; without the intense anger. Well, I suppose I carry intense anger, I just internalize it. I'm 29 years old, and began cutting at 13. At that age, I never understood why I did it, except that I refused to hurt others. Its been atleast a decade since I cut, but I moved from cutting , to burning. I still feel urges, to this very day, to do it. It's out of frustration; frustration of not being able to trust people with my feelings and thoughts, not being able to effectively verbally communicate my feelings and thoughts. Frustrated with everything, and myself. I did it to punish myself. I did it, because I hated myself. Most of the time, I still hate myself. Feelings of unworthiness, loneliness, distrustfullness, self-hatred, being abandoned... constantly flood my mind. As a teenager, those feelings existed, but for other reasons. Now as an adult, it seems even more valid. Living in the adult real world is even more harsh than I thought it would be. I feel the urge to cut or burn right now, because lately some drastic changes have occured in my life. However, I haven't burned myself since I was 23. Now I find myself internalizing everything. So i am cconstantly punishing myself. I reafirm my thoughts by telling myself, it is truth. When I was younger, my mother saw my wounds, and got worried. She sent me to talk to the school nurse, and I can't remember a thing about it. Never went to a doc for meds, headshrinking stuff, or anything of the like. Apparently my mother wasn't that worried about it. I still haven't been to a doctor; I can't afford it. I have tried St.John's wort, and at times, it worked. Now I live in the middle of nowhere, so I have no access, and still again, no money. I can't sleep. Even after taking sleeping pills, my mind is too busy to rest. I have also begun fasting. Not sure why though, but I like the idea of weight loss. Even the part about drug abuse fits me. In 96 I was with an extremely verbally abusive guy, 11 yrs my senior. Those 4 yrs were the worst times of my life. He pounded it into my head, what a worthless peice of shit I was, ect... on a daily basis. He was heavy into drugs, so I said, what the hell. I hated suffering, and I didn't give a shit wether I lived or died, so, for 4 years, I used drugs heavily. I have been clean of all illegal drugs since 2000, however. I also have panic attacksbreakdowns and nonsense of the like. Anyway, lol... this was long enough, so, along with the introductory poll thing, here I am, in all my darkened glory.

Current Mood: anxious
Monday, May 12th, 2003
5:43 pm
[puremania]
name: niki
age: 18
living situation: with my parents, about to move out
how long have you cut? since i was 11
how long since you last cut? march something
does anyone know you cut? some close friends and about 10 or 11 doctors
do you know anyone else who cuts? yeah, but not for the same reasons i did
tell me something awesome about you: i'm an artist and a musician
tell me something sucky about you: lots, i have really really low self esteem
who is your favorite band/musician? the buzzcocks
what is your best skill? hmm .. dunno, probly painting
if you were reincarnated, what would you like to be?: uuuh, a canvas to be painted over

Current Mood: grr.
Saturday, April 12th, 2003
12:16 pm
[maligna]
shadows, slipping back
name: marianne
age: 17
living situation: on my own
how long have you cut? 11 years
how long since you last cut? 2 hours
does anyone know you cut? jen and too many doctors
do you know anyone else who cuts? yes
tell me something awesome about you: i have a child
tell me something sucky about you: they took her away from me
who is your favorite band/musician? nick cave
what is your best skill? going without
if you were reincarnated, what would you like to be?: a storm
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